Get a longer-lasting erection with a stiff Martini

Erectile dysfunction affects over 5.6 million men in the UK, with 40% of guys over the age of 40 regularly feeling a little “down”. You can guard against frustrating detumescence by oiling the pipes with a Martini. The natural oil in olives is rich in the “good” (monounsaturated) fats also found in avocados, peanuts and oily fish. A study in the Journal Of Applied Physiology found that men with more “good” oil in their diets had higher testosterone levels and a stronger sex drive.

The Second University of Naples also discovered that the improved circulation encouraged by the monounsaturated Martini garnish improved erection strength and regularity by 30%. Plus, it reduces your risk of heart disease. But please, just watch out for the gin, won’t you? After all, you want the ladies to be stirred, not shaken.